If I had the time.
I was sitting here thinking about the Mayan Calendar and the fact that it ends 3 days from now, and people are predicting the end of the world as we know it. I think about all the things I haven't done in my life and all the things I have.
I have to wonder now, what I might do if I had more than three days to live. In my mind, I can see myself completing some projects around the house, a greenhouse full of mature plants and seedlings waiting to be replanted. I can see the third bedroom in my house being painted and setup as another guest bedroom. Alas, I only have three days and that just isn't enough time.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell everyone what it was like being 5 years old attending a Catholic church and school in a small town in NC. I could tell you what it was like having a Marine for a dad. I could tell that exercise was so important that dad setup an obstacle course in our backyard for my brother and I to run, day in and day out.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you how awesome it was to be chosen to lead the class in the Pledge of Allegiance. I could tell you how good you feel after saying the Lord's Prayer and asking God to help others. I could also tell you that not one kid in my class ever complained about learning or saying either one.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you what it was like for a five and six yr old kid to walk over a mile each day, to and from school. I could tell you it was easy to learn how to ride a bike pushing off of a telephone pole and coming to a stop grabbing the next one.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you that throwing your child from a 10 meter platform springboard is the best way to teach your children to swim. I could tell you that holding them under water against their will, increases their lung capacity, makes them strong swimmers, and tunes their skills of survival.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you about some of the exotic places I lived as a child. I could tell you about a town that had ~20 permanent residents, that swelled to over 150,000 one summer. I could tell you in this town you either rode horses or walked, and rodeos were held basically in our front yard. I could tell you about the law posted on the sign as you enter this town clearly stated, "If you carry a gun it must be loaded."
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you how awesome it was to be a second and third grader that rode a horse everyday to deliver newspapers all over the town and mountains of Love Valley, NC., and always alone. I could tell you how much work it was to wake each morning before sunup to feed, water and clean stalls in a barn that housed as many as thirty horses a night.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you what it is really like to move 10 times before the age of thirteen. I could tell you what it is like to still communicate with friends from some of these places. I could tell you what it is like to remember the names of others you wish you could find on Facebook or other social media.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you about the awesome friends I had as a teenager. Some may even read this post and will remember, drinking quarts of beer, and Boone's Farm wine. I could tell you about a girlfriend whose father was a highway patrol officer, and how North Hills was the greatest place on earth. I could tell you what the first day of School Busing and integration was like in North Carolina.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you how as a teenager, my friends and I ruled North Hills Mall. I could tell you about setting off M80's in the mall and about a man that shot people in the parking lot one afternoon. I could also tell you about Dead Man's lake, an abandoned house, stolen bakery goods, and dynamite.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you about a friend that blew his hand off with blasting caps. I could also tell you about a kid named Randy and a house that blew up in Quail Hollow at Dead Man's Lake. I could tell you what it was like camping under a willow tree and running through the drainage pipes in the neighborhoods of North Hills.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you about being suspended 27 times in the eighth grade. I could tell you about the summer 17 kids in Raleigh, NC ran away from home to an abandoned house out in the sticks off of Six Forks Rd. I could tell you what it feels like being handcuffed to friends at three in the morning and about the looks on the faces of your friend's parents at 4:30 AM.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you what it is like for a 14 year old to hitch-hike from North Carolina to California. From Nantucket Island to Ft. Meyers beach Florida. I could tell you how lonely it is to walk on a dark, deserted road in Iowa at two in the morning, or how cold it was to sleep in a Goodwill box in Minnesota. I can tell you that sleeping under a bridges is not all it is cracked up to be.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you what it was like at fourteen to test LSD fresh out of a test tube. I could also tell you approximately how many one-hundred dollar bills you can roll to put in a test tube. I could also tell you that at one time, there were men that believed the best way to get money out of the United States to avoid taxes was to stick test tubes in your ass filled with hundred dollar bills.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you about the Outlaw Motorcycle Gang taking a town hostage. I could tell you that they really will shoot your car if you refuse to stop at one of their roadblocks, and they will certainly lie about paying you for the damages. I can also tell you that Union Grove, NC had the TWO best Fiddler's Conventions in the United States during the 70's.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you getting married at 16 is not the best decision in the world. I could also tell you that it is not necessary to go on public assistance when you have a child at eighteen. I can tell you what it was like having to have a spouse sign for you to get a learners and work permit in order to drive and work.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you how hard it is to manually change tractor trailer tires. Why a bone spatula is used to remove spots in clothes, and how to set and grout ceramic tiles. I could tell you how KISS is important in business and explain what the term "He who speaks first loses," actually means.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you that most college educations go unused. I could tell you that Sallie Mae is the best detective agency in the world, and that manual labor actually makes you feel pretty good. I could tell you that learning is a never ending process and encourage people to take good notes.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you that the Department of Corrections is the largest Law Enforcement Agency in many States. I could explain to you the difference between an Inmate and a Convict. I could explain to you how even a dangerous and hostile citizen can be a good and model prisoner.
If I decided to write a book, I could tell you what it is like to die at forty-seven years of age, only to have a skilled doctor replace damaged body parts and bring you back to life. I could tell you what it is like laying in a bed trying to tell your spouse how awesome they have been in your life. I can tell you that you never feel you said enough. I could assure you that you eventually accept the fact that it is time to sleep and that it is very peaceful.
Yeah, if I had more time, I could probably write an interesting story. In these past 20 mins I have only scratched the surface of some of the events in my life. If I actually took the time to think about it, I could probably write a few books. But alas, the world ends in 3 more days and I just don't have the time anymore.
12/18/2012 11:26:28 am
Chris , this is awsome!! You cannot imagine the memories this brought back. I remember the night we got ahold of the Boones Farm. The next day i felt so bad i dont think i have had a drink since!!
12/19/2012 12:05:56 am
That is funny man. I remember a hell of a lot more. However, if I told you the memories I would have to kill ya. Maybe this is pre-Alzheimers man I am not sure. Let's see I can remember a BB gun pistol, a CB radio base station in your room. Condoms in a bedside drawer. I'll shut up.
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